My telephone...uh uh my telephone

Now this is becoming annoying. I hadn't heard from the fighter for almost three full days. To be honest, I really hadn't noticed his lack of communication skills this time. Perhaps it was because I was busy at work or maybe it was because I was distracted by other interests, not sure. But I'm going to leave work last night and lo and behold I had a text from him.

This is what it read..."fml....sorry so busy with hw and fighting sooooo ok it has been three days, how are ya?"

My instant reaction was a mixture of shock and joy...oh [fighter] text me! Then I read it and the eyebrow raised and I was a little confused. Is he recognizing the fact that it is inappropriate to not at all communicate for three days or is he communicated because he realizes this and feels obligated? Neither one are really an acceptable reason to text I suppose. In my eyes, when you're into someone you want to hear from them. It makes your heart skip a beat and creates a warm smile on your face that can't be replaced by even the worst news for at least five minutes. You want to know about their day, how they are doing and what they have been up to (in a curious I want to learn more about your life way, not I want to know you're every step for the last twenty four hours in a creepy stalker way.)

So I responded with a simple It is fine, I have been really busy too how are you, and he answered but then I remembered I have this dinner party to go to on Friday night. It is with four of my best friends. Two of which are the ones that set fighter and I up. My best friend Care Bear's boyfriend used to be his roommate in college. I asked him if he had plans on Friday night and no response. I now know how bad a no response feels and I now feel even worse because this is what I did to the banker on Monday.

The banker and I went out the night I got food poisoning and for some reason I just do not feel any chemistry or a connection. He truly is a fantastic guy but maybe it is his rush for a commitment that scares me. It is obvious his mission now that he has his life and career set, is to find a wife. I am simply not that girl, not now and not anytime soon. So when he repetitively asked me out on Tuesdays. First he called Monday night, but I was at work. Then he called Tuesday morning and I was not quite alone at the time and did not want to answer the phone. Then he text me and asked me if I could do dinner Wednesday, when I said I worked he then asked if I could do something anytime this weekend. It was at this point I just stopped responding. For some reason I was annoyed. With myself more than it was about the situation. I needed to be honest with him and tell him that I was not that into him and he should move on. This is by far the hardest thing to do in dating and this is the part that I absolutely hate doing, because it is always me. I am always the one the isn't "feeling it" somehow, somewhere and I break things off. Still I would hope that he appreciates the honesty.

So this is why I am so frustrated with fighter. In essence, I date like a man. Or at least I have more of a man's mentality when it comes to dating. The more the better, because this means more options. I always have someone on speed dial for those lonely nights, I have a best guy friend when needed for those dates that you cannot find a date too and I don't text, call, a.k.a, blow up their phone on a daily basis. I am chill, I am fun and I am not drama. Which this is why I have come to find that I seem to be every guys dream girl and why every guy that meets me tends to fall in love with me (according to my friend Chris, who explained this to me the other night, and I don't mean to boast, but he thinks I'm the shit! Which is why I love him and he is my friend!) So if I don't text back the banker because I am not interested, then isn't fighter just don't the same thing to me? I understand that you are busy. I am busy too. I balance just as much in a days time. Mind you I am not in school at the moment (much needed summer break to figure out what the fuck I'm doing with my life), I also am not a professional MMA fighter but somewhere between noon and midnight, I'm sure you can find time to have a two minute conversation even if it is via text message. I mean guys dedicate more time to taking a shit, text me then (just don't let on what you are doing). I know we were all supposed to take the Oprah challenge, but you have a 30 minute drive to and from work, call me then.

Well blogger, I am going to go on a vegetarian diet again. So I need to go plan my weekly meals, slap a little bit of my face on and head out to the grocery store. My weight is a constant issue with me lately and I need to make a change if I want a change to happen and even though I eat healthy I just simply do not eat enough. I'm also going to cut out the coffee so everyone BEWARE, mega bitch is about to come out for a few days while I experience withdraws!