Skinny Jeans

We all have skinny jeans. I'm not talking about the new fashion statement jeans where you literally have to use a set of pliers to get your ankles into them, I'm talking the pair of jeans that we wear when we are at our goal weight and feeling fabulous. A girl does not need a scale in her household if she has a pair of these jeans. She simply puts them on, on a daily basis (you mean I'm the only one that obsessively does this as of late)? If you are retaining water, they may just be hard to button. About to start your period, can't bend your knees as you walk or sit down because that said button will pop and you simply cannot be responsible for where it would end up. If you've gained five pounds, can't button them. Ten pounds? Well forget it, they are not getting passed your knee caps. Yes, apparently when you're teetering on 25 even your knees can gain weight.

My question to myself is this. Why do my skinny jeans have to be a pair of Rock n' Republics? I realize that the brand has slowly faded, and Seven would be a better pair of jeans to own, as Seven's simply never go out of style. But I love Victoria Beckham and these are the design of posh herself, with crowns on the buttocks that are stitched ever so perfectly your but actually sits a little higher. The dark denim slims the thigh and the large flair fits over a pair of Alice and Olivia's so perfectly making anyone who puts these jeans on appear to be a supermodel with Heidi Klum legs! This is double torture. Not only can I not fit into these jeans at the moment, but they are my favorite pair! They sit there and taunt me on a daily basis. Not so much during the summer months as they do the winter. That is when their childish rants cannot be drowned out by any number of slim fast bars and popsicles.

Mind you I can get them past my knees. In fact I can get them on. I can even button them, if I want to appear to have 12 inches of love handles spilling over the sides of the waistband and not be able to breathe, but how is that attractive? So because I do not own a scale, I will keep pulling out my skinny jeans to track the progress of my hard work and hopefully by October, if it is not too hot, I will wear my skinny jeans on my 25th birthday!